it stumbles you, yet at the same time, uplifts you.
does anybody know what i mean?
i d'noe, sometimes i really wonder whether my mind is warped, so much so that the theories and all running through my head make no sense to anyone else but me. but that's even if they make any sense to me in the first place. i don't know what's wrong with me these few days, or weeks. which ever. like i mentioned to sheng earlier, i get depressed really easily. maybe it's not depression as such, but it's close enough i guess? it's like... just discontent with the life i'm living. perhaps it's inner strife, perhaps not. i guess i won't really find out til i get better, or i have some revelation of sorts. he gets out at 12 tomorrow. might meet him after school, hopefully. one more strong case of familiarity. definitely meeting up with him on friday though. thinking of watching 50 first dates. school today sucked, same as most days. there's this song that caine sent me (thank you, caine.) that i think encompasses with he feels sometimes. yup. shall post a bit of the lyrics up later, probably not the whole song though. and i found out pravin and fiona read this.. so hello pravin! hello fiona! (: anyhowsies. i shall try to cheer up. i don't really know how i'm going to do that though? "always look on the bright side of life.. dudududududududu!" ha, maybe that works. just maybe. dinner plans got scrapped today cos we were all too sweaty sticky and tired. that resulted in me going straight home. it felt good going straight home though. managed to catch a nap, then had quality talk time. like almost 2 hours. i really miss having all that time to waste away. trying to think of the people i can really count on when i feel like shite. and i can only come up with a few.
my best friend, miss choy is going through some sort of emotional turmoil. that is truly tragic, i know exactly how she feels. well maybe not exactly, but close enough. our lives aren't supposed to suck at the same time, but it sure seems like that's what's happening right now. that's just not supposed to happen. sigh. well, i guess we both have reasons for living, some similar, others different. but we still have each other, regardless of the circumstance. (ceteris paribus!) okay, i'm too tired to blog anymore. stupid 2.4 tomorrow yuckyuckyucks!
i want to hold you
protect you from all of the things i've already endured
...
i will always love you
... i know it's supposed to be a father-daughter kinda' song. but it's quite applicable, i think. 'cos he's always warning me of things that're inevitably going to happen. just that i'm too damn stubborn and too damn proud to heed his advice half the time. apologies for that, i know he means well. and i feel really bad whenever i blow up at him, or make him feel redundant in my life. 'cos he's definitely not. truth is, he's the most important person in my life, aside from my family and my bestfriend. and he's always been there for me, even though i don't deserve it. even though i lost my temper, throw tantrums, yell, gripe, whine and complain for hours on end, am insensitive, am over posessive at times, uncompromising & demanding... it says alot of the relationship that we have. through all the times you've stood by me, i've realized that i can really count on you, not only for sound advice, but for comfort and undying love. thank you.
posted by meishi @ 11:37 PM
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